Tuesday, June 07, 2005

Dear Daddy

Abba, Father
I never knew my own father growing up and had a series of step-fathers to whom I didn't attach, or at least had no sense that they would be there for me. I discovered the deeper impact this had on my life when I realized the private, intimate way Jesus said we should address almighty God. Abba is the colloquial address for father that is similar to "papa" or "daddy." I decided to pray to God and address him as my "Daddy."
The first time I did it, I broke down crying. It was too painful and unfamiliar to so address the Lord. It took several tries to where I could address God that way without crying; several more tries to get pass the address and move into the sense that I could crawl into the lap of God and speak to him so personally.
So, recently, I began a journal of letters/prayers to my heavenly Daddy. Sometimes, I am asking him for help. Sometimes, I "tell" on people and say, "Daddy, he's hurting me." Sometimes I tell my heavenly Daddy how much I love him and want to spend time with him.
These prayers have brought me closer to Him in that I feel drawn to the one who would so care about me at this level. I am more aware of his readiness to envelop me in his arms, to come to my rescue, to provide. I love my heavenly Daddy. He has never failed me. He has fully provided for me. Most of all, he makes himself fully available to me. I want more of him!!